New Blog

I've a new blog. all in chinese, maybe i am better in chinese so prefer to blog in chinese. I have time still will blog here i suppose. yeah. and the link is by the side.

http://tinkledreamz.blogspot.com

see ya!!!

I SAW TORNADO LIVE!!!!

Oh my!! today something BIG happen in my life!!! i SAW a TORNADO LIVE!!!!!! cool right? but scary as well la... though is a small scale one~ is once in a life time ma~ not as if i keep gg onto the sea right? so wow. keke... sad that dont have a good camera with me.. if not can take photo of it!! if the guy that took photo send me the photo i will confirm paste it here man!!! keke.. we shall wait n see...

today work till 5pm nia~ kekee... later got tuition. sad. if not can go out. but.. money come first! yeah. so sad~ sea EX this sunday! woo... canoeing wor~ hope nth happen this sunday~~ GOD MUST BLESS US WOR~~~

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE PPL?

yesh!! what is wrong with the ppl at the bus stop? if u feel that u are going to be late or what, wake up earlier and get earlier buses that dont have the crowd, why must u sleep till whatever time u like, miss a few buses due to the crowd then in the end get on the bus from the exit claiming that u have been waiting for very long? being so thick skin n irritating when the rest also wait patiently for their turn to get on the bus? those ppl are just oo irritating!!!

i really hope one day there will be someone throwing them down the bus let them know the right way to get onto a bus. people in sg just too "nice". they just hate to create scene and hence ppl out there that are nasty enough will win. in stead of getting on the bus from the back push the ppl inwards la~ why must u guys do such things to make ppl hate u???

though i know i write this they also wont get to see, or even they wont understand cause they are those uncivilised aunties and uncles. BUT STILL I HATE IT!!!

will time fade of the feeling or cause the relationship to die down?

relationship is really something very difficult to cope with. one really learn alot and grow up in a relationship. You will learn to accept the strength and weakness of your love one, will got to learn and accept the differences both of u have, got to tolerate with things that you cant stand yet is in him, got to shower him with love though sometimes it hurts on ur side.

thing ppl who view my blog will realise my entry is mostly on my relationship. A bit dramatic i guess, always say till like we gonna break but in the end happy ending. I'm glad that i always end up happy but i am scare that some days things might be different. i put in all i have for this relationship, i really love him alot. i can feel the same from him too, yet seems like not again.

to me, he is just very very complicated. i dont know how to say but just very complicated. in a way he is simple, in a way he is complex. haiz...

dont know.

dont know.

dont know.

wOrkIng!!

yesh!!! i am working already. Currently working in ITE east si mei. Yup! hehee... working under the HR admin Dept. Know couple of nice people around. Rose is the one that i am helping out now and she is VERY helpful!!!

I actually got to leave this place this friday. So.. i actually have the assignment for 2 wks only. But glad to say i am allowed to stay till end june! YEAH! thanks to the new staff that is unable to make it till later date. HAHAHAA... And of course must thank my dear ROSE and myself la! hahaa... if not she help me ask i also cant get, if not for my hardwork also got nth right? kekee..

dArling was sick over the weekend. He so poor thing. visit me last weekend and got himself sick the next weekend. sob. Worst still, he got an exam on monday and he couldnt study for it due to the sickness. Poor boy... in the end he said the paper sure gone~ hopefully nt that bad~ *pray hard hard*

new hair style!!!!

YOZ!!!! yesh! this is my new hair style.. cut it last thurday on the 26th of april!! wow... cool right? IT"S BOB!!! BY STEVE. hahaa.. yeah... dom's hairstylist steve. he is damn good la. very pro too.. used to look very ugly in short hair.. those who've seen should kNow.. but nOW!!! wahhahaa.. everyone say i look nice la.. KAWAII DES!!!!

cool.. like it.. so light.. so refreshing! dar keep calling me bob. hahaa...

yeah... today... kinda unlucky day.. went to high commission of malaysia to do my renunciation stuff.. wah.. then didnt bring daddy's photocopied birth cert! damn sian.. then they allow me to go home take then give them by 1pm though they close at 11. though is kind enough of them. BUT IS I RENUNOUNCE LEHZ!!!! not my parents ma.. want so many things for what.. the form all filled in relavent stuff le ma.. haiz...

then went home by taxi.. surprizingly is only ard 10 bucks.. tot will be much more... cause i feel that is quite far~ then took taxi back.. IT RAIN!!!!! i didnt take umbrella out lor~~ sian... was walking in the rain out to get taxi.. then... RAIN CATS N DOGS SIA... like god is also laughing at my stupidity lor.. all drench like just bath...

in the end... landed up at the petrol station to wait for the rain to get smaller.. then i go out to fetch a cab.. wah~~ come back so COLD!!!! Brrr.... bath le then slp. wake up feel like shit. sian.. coughing non stop. feel like got fever. headache.. etc..

haiz... today kinda down.. kinda suay... kinda fruastrated..

tml got interview.. at ite east campus.. wanna get yet dont want. cause it is quite inaccessible from here.. sian.. yeah... wanna get the tang ling shopping mall de.. but.. no.. sian... JOB!!! FASTER COME!!!

ARGH!!!!

why can we never come to a conclusion?? why?? why cant we ever come to a compromise of what to do?

he will always rub salt into his unhappiness to my family, the way i do stuff, my attitude towards stuff, my forgetfulness and things like that.

i will always make a big fuss of his "friendliness", his way of treating his female friends, his group of female friends, his need of having female friends....

HAIZ... this has been a problem and always a big problem in our relationship but this hasnt been solved and donT kNow how to solve it!!!!!!

he has his need, and is having the freedom to have female friends. not as if i stopped him to have female friends, just that those he has makes me feel sucky. i just cant understand. he had friends that will take hugs, kisses and holding hands as friendliness, but i cant take it i told him. so why cant he change to having other female friend who kNows the basic distant and who will respect him as a friend when he reject those gesture.

just like he cant understand me at time, i dont understand him...

he said i understand him the most among all his gf, he said he love me to most, he said he treasure me the most, but~~ but~~ haiz....

i dont understand the need of finding those kind of female friends, i dont understand the need of gg to pub to relax, i dont understand.... am i nOt enough for him to feel good and complete? he told me i completes his life but he still request to knOw more female friends. that makes me feel like he needs more to complete his life. let me feel like i'm restricting his freedom, let me feel that i made his life less interesting and more boring, let me feel that i caused him to lose his female friends... if they are true friends... why will they leave u cause i feel uncomfortable about the closeness? why?

u left me with lots of question marks...

haiz...

why my xin fu simple times can nv really last... in the middle of it... things will happen... always will.... haiz....

maybe i think too much... maybe... dont know... lots of dont know....

I dont understand~~~

after a long long while. ya... been busy with school work recently. hard to have time to blog it even it is something that bothers me alot. hai... now it is nearing my exam and kinda have more time to myself rather to the school or the hall.. so i can start blogging again. yup.

can see from my tone, my title and my words that i am not very in a great mood today. yup.
my grandma went to the hospital recently. initially she came to singapore. then she kept asking for food from us.. this and that. you knOw.. when old ppl start to behave abnormally, ppl will feel that it might be that she is leaving us soon~~ then she got kinda sick. couldnt eat. keep vomiting, then diahorrea...

then she went back to malaysia, stayed in my uncle's hse. she fell and went to the hospital. luckily she was fine.. nth much... not long after, she sick again. then went to hospital for a check and found out that there are 14 stones in her stomach. hence, she needed an operation. after the operation, she was very weak and all. then couldnt really walk. still cant really eat. problem still persist. she sounded very weak and start to talk quite abnormally. she dont really have much energy to talk too. that makes us more worried.

past few days, called back home and realise that doctor found something clogging her brain that caused her to not able to walk. she need some help to walk not like before anymore. it might be some blood clog due to the fall that she had, or might be some stuff in there. that we dont really kNow.

now she is back to yong peng. initially mum said nOt going back. but now~~ hai... they are gg back from friday evening till sunday morning. gosh!! had a tiff with my bf for saying that i am going back to msia on saturday. i went my way despite him being unhappy that i go oversea during exam period. now saying that i need to go on friday???? moreover when my mum said nOt going, i still msg him and told him that. hai...

sometimes i really dont understand him. why is he so strong on certain stuff yet so flexible on others. haiz.. i respect him therefore i told him in advance. but he in turn got angry with me and demanded for As for my result. doesnt mean if i stayed on for the weekend i will score an A isnt it? moreover, almost whole saturday is for tuition~~ including friday night too~~. sunday most likely meeting him. so? why is he so strong on it? i dont understand and couldnt understand....

happy birthday to me!!!!

yesh!! my bday just over... 21st bday!!! on the 1st of march~~

27th of feb i had a celebration, booked a chalet and invited my frenz over for a vegetarian bbq!!! i thought i had lots of friends, invited alot of people but in the end, only 20plus came i guess. some are busy, some having exams, some have lessons till late night, i can understand, but the rest? no news~~~ haiz.. dont talk about.

i went for a play that day, then all the stuff leave to darling to bring them over.... i felt bad as there're really lots of stuff, but he said he can make it, so he really made it. Though i got tick off for not bringing certain stuff that i can bring along for my play. sorry darling~~~

then, i made a BIG mistake too.. i forgot to tell the caterer that it's at the chalet and to send it to the chalet. In the end, when he was half way to my hse, darling called and he was quite pissed off. haiz... here it goes... sorry again~~(nothing much i can say)

i kinda spoilt my own mood for the celebration though as i should do all things properly when i kNow darling is kinda bad tempered person. but in the end, when we reached, he still able to simmer down and stay throughout the celebration happily.

here, i wanna thanks darren (pei's bf) for being there the earliest despite having FYP to do.. he helped alot! i really mean alot! and keep dar dar entertained at the bbq pit too~~ then jin came and help me around here and there too.. THANK U LAO GONG!!! kekee...

then people start to come group by group. hereby i like to thank all presence~~

thank u dennis, qiao ming and gentle giant(junhao) for coming!! was quite shock that u guys came ask i didnt expect that. thanks guys. i'm touched!!

thanks to youxiang who came when initially all he knOws is just dom and me. thanks for staying up throughout the night telling me so many things~ thanks brother!

thanks to michelle with such a lovely present!!! and make such a nice card!!! thanks to her for coming down after closing the shop. so sweet of u to come even though u have to come alone. THANKS SIS!!!

thanks to zi yang who came down specially just to pass me my present and went off. thanks alot!!! i love ur present!! thanks!!!

thanks to yong qiang, tianying and weichen, the only 3 jcrc that made it down for my celebration. Thanks to yu xin who actually called to apologise when he cant make it. was quite touched by that. thanks to shun yuan who actually almost made it to come. though in the end he couldnt make it, i appreciate alot for the wishes and the invitation to K box!! keke.. thanks to joan who told me beforehand that she couldnt make it as she was sick, take care girl. as for the rest of the jcrc members, i was quite disappointed. in fact, very. i thought jcrc had bond us quite close together, but i guess not... too bad...

thanks to jia hong and tang ning from production that made it down to the celebration too!!! all the way from hall to pasir ris~~ cool~~ thanks for the present too~~ swannie, thanks for the wishes, how i wish u can be there too.. kekee...

thanks to shi fu!!! who came down despite his wife can give birth anytime man!!! oh cool!!! thanks shi fu!!! thanks wei ren and bernard for the gift too~~~

Lastly, a big big thank you to my ai ren, wan ping, who end quiz at 9pm, come all the way from nus to the chalet, being so so tired, giving me the wishes and showing the true friendship that really touched my heart. thanks ping~~ thank u!

OH!!! must thank my dear pei pei too~~ for being there when i got scolded till everyone left being there helping me entertaining my guest and celebrating with me!!! thanks man!!!

NOW, i want to thank darling for waking up early in the morning 6am to buy the ingredient for me, buy me nice breakfast, then went over to office, do his stuff, rush over to meet yx to register for his uni, then rush to florist to get me the 99 roses (so so sweet!! all hand pick by him personally!!!), get me such a wonderful heart shape cake~, brought all the stuff alone to the chalet (like an idiot that's what he said), setting up all the stuff, be my bbq man, clearing all the stuff for me, help me bring the stuff back home, giving me a wonderful bday celebration!!! thanks darling~~ without u i wouldnt be able to make this celebration come true~~ thanks darling!!!!

LOVE U ALOT!!!! THANKS FOR EVERYTHING U HAVE DONE FOR ME!!!

有了他,天天都是情人节

特别吧? 这次的布络革(BLOG)是以华语来写的。没为什么，就想用华语。

情人节 （2/14）
这对我来说是第二次有情人的情人节，很开心但也苦脑，他什么都有，害我不知买什么才好。最后决定做个起士蛋糕给他。是蓝梅口味的。而当天我们便来个DOUBLE DATE。 哈哈！！他的好朋友夫妻便同我们一起庆祝这节日。

到了他朋友的店时，他便很温柔的亲了我的脸将礼物交给我。好甜哦！！！！ 真是甜到心里了！！！ 虽然不像别人一样有花，但我也满足了！！ 他送我一只 STITCH，睡眼惺忪的，好像他！！ 哈哈！！ 真可爱！！

后来，我们一同吃晚饭，然后一起去唱歌！！

好开心！有了他,天天都是情人节！！！！

Miss-Matched <<錯 合>>

Our Production "Miss-Matched" <<錯 合>> had ended yesterday night at jubilee hall. It was wonderful experience that i ever had and i really love it!!! Great experience and is really different.

I used to be in the band, i thought the feeling will be the same after the performance. The achievement and happiness we get when we know we played it well and in harmony. However, it is so so different. When we were rehearsing in jubilee hall, it was so COOL! we were actually on the stage!! the feeling was great! fantastico!! hahaa...

I was acting a shy shy role where she only dare to admire someone secretly but never in action. Hence, till 25 still single. The greatest challenge for me in acting this is that I AM NOT HER!!! It is just the exact opposite. Everyone also scare that i couldnt make it. Even my director wrote in the letter after the whole performance pointing out that i was one of their worries. hahaha... I do have the same mentallity as the role, just i will react in a differet way.

On 9th feb 2007, 7.40pm, the show started. I was trembling feeling so so nervous. Still we have to act normal as if nothing is happening. The light was strong enough that we cant really see the audience. That was great help. So i thought, audience might be the reason for being scared. Then, while acting, they started laughing at the funny scenes we had. OH MY GOD!!! I felt so so GOOD!!! It was like, an amazing feeling that i never had. Felt so.... so... haiz... limited vocab dont know how to describe.

Then, all the trembing feeling started to fade off and excitement came. Felt so good and wanted to act to the best i can. After 4 months of training, i want to put up the best. I want to be into the role, i dont want to regret my life. Fire burning in me! haha... Half time came and the directors all came in and congrats us for being good in the first half. There were lots of unexpected laughters from the audience. Our scene alot of people thought that it is boring however, there were people laughing!!!!! oh my!!! so so so happy!!!

10th feb 2007, 10pm. Our final show ended!!! Kinda sad, kinda miss everything. Things seems to be going so so so fast! I couldnt even believe myself that i've already acted for 2 days! My friends told me i just dont look and feel like who i m on stage. I WAS JUST DAMN HAPPY LA! hahaa... because i succeeded!!! He even commented that it is too short a play!! means? HE ENJOYED IT! hahahaa.... COOL!

I really miss all the people that made this play a success! Thanks to all!!! too many to name. But ALL!!

hmm... is this healthy or not?

In one of my previous entry, i talked about my relationship problem. Yesterday, darling told me he called his girl friends and told them that it's the end of their friendship. hmm... i really wondering is that healthy or not?

i never expected him to do that. all i thought of was just to get to know about those girls more. At least, to know their name (which till now i still dont know). But, it turn out that they just will not exist anymore. i really appreciate him for doing that, but i felt kinda weird. Is it really that friendship with opposite gender and relationship cannot co-exist at the same time?

i know saying all this is kinda bad~~ in a way, i should thank him for what he had done. Just that i find it a little extreme and i dont know what to do. Pondering.....

No matter what, i thank you for what u have done for me~ i appreciate everything you had done. Let's be more transparent with each other in the future k? Love u!

JIN's Bday!!!

27th of Jan, the day where jin was born in 1986. BOOM!!! In 2007, SHE IS NOW 21!!! wow!!!

she had a bbq at east coast and we went! kekee... though that day was drizzling since morning and all, it was kinda lucky as her bbq was able to start and end without us getting in the rain!!! GOD BLESS!! we had great fun!!! ZX was going around showing poka card magic tricks. kinda cool!!! yet, i keep catching his loop holes.... woops.. kekee... fun la!!! but couldnt deny that he is really quite good!

When ping reached, we asked jin to take our present and open. We bought a cute cute bubble dress for her, white base with small black poka dots... so kawaii!!! then she went to put on and gave her the nice nice necklace ping bought!! so nice!! really cool la! she so so pretty!! then she wore that to cut cake!!!

then we had a very professional photographer, HS!! wow.. he was cool! he brought a thousand over dollar olympus camera!!! oh my!! that was like so COOL!!! then he took lots of pics for us. walking around taking artistic photos too!! kekee...

after which when jin is free from her phototaking session with all present, we aske HS to help the 3 of us take photos!! with his cool camera, we took lots of funny photos like those ghostly ones, funny ones, formal ones, artistic ones... COOL!! so fun too!!

then the sky looks quite threatening and hence we decided to pack up. we then go to sm's hse and chill out!!! bought supper and ate. yeah! talk, watch video, slack around and slp! kekee... cool place to slp in, even the sofa is better than my bed ar! hahahaa....

after we woke up we eat we talk we eat again then we talk again. hahaa... then i got to go back school for rehearsal already!

the rehearsal turn out to be good! they complemented on my acting that day! cool!! first time ever!! hahaahahaa... feeling so so good! yeah!!! great weekend!

PRESENTATION DAY!!!

today had a presentation, is for my chinese classical fiction module. we are suppose to read, understand and tell the class a story <<李娃传>>.

during our preparation and all, everything was fine, quite good and we are happy doing it too. Fast and good! then sent over to let the teacher vet, she said was well done. then today, is the actual day. kinda nervous but alright, as it is just a small class. talk and talk and talk none stop. we took up almost whole tutorial which is an hour to present our stuff. COOL huh? First ever longest presentation i've ever done!! kekee...

after that was quite tired. survive through the next lecture with a good funny teacher. was so tired.

this two days having some stomach problem. keep feeling unwell at the stomach area. Like i have lots of gastric juice inside. dOnt kNow why like that. kinda donT like the feeling buT dont kNow what to do. so be it.

yesterday dar cooked spaghetti for me!!! SO NICE!!!!!!!!! and he got a dish, "口在心里", he put the nuts that my mum cooked into those small beancurd stuff, dou po, then fried it. SO SO NICE!!!!!!! love it. great dinner!!! thanks thanks!!! and he say he called that dish that is he feel that sometime he just dont knOw how to express himself, donT kNow what to say. ya lor..

thanks thanks!!!!

school reopen again!!!!

yeah! new sem started. everything goes back again~ study and study again!! lucky i dont have to take any unfamiliar sub this sem. mostly chinese with one Craft of Writing. It is exempted for exam. so hahahhahahahaaha... one less exam!!!

since school starts, dar and i arent as sticky anymore. got school stuff to do, he also preparing to start school soon. however, i dont know why, dont understand why, since school starts, we have been quarrelling quite often. Almost everytime when we meet we quarrel. I DONT LIKE IT!!! IN FACT I HATE IT!!! but to him, it is normal in a relationship. tiny tiny things we got to quarrel. He'll just get angry over little little stuff that i really dOnt knOw how not to make him angry. I really wonder is it my fault or his. At times, he admit that it is his fault, yet, he still seems the same. At times, he just say, that is him. when he says that, i got nth much to say. Because i dOnt want to change who he is yet i dont feel that it is right. hai....

Relationship really takes alot to maintain. ALOT. It is really not something that kids can play around with if u are really putting in ur heart and soul. Having a good family is what i dream for. Having a loving husband is what i hope for. I'm not saying he is not, but sometimes, things i thought normal bf will do he dont. But at times, he does things that other guys wont too!

Guys and gers really think very differently.

1)When he tells me he is going out alone, i will want to go out with him too, thinking that how nice it will be if i am free and able to follow him. Yet he dont feel that way, he say is just because he wanna let me know where he is not want me down. As for me? if i tell him i am alone, i am expecting him to accompany me. To me bf must be there whenever u are lonely unless he is really being tied down with work.

2)He needs time for himself, i only hope i can spend all my time with him.

3)He sees crying as being weak, i see crying as a way for me to let out my emotions.

4)I hope for his surprises in hall, he need to know when i am going over to plan his time.

many many more.....

It is just me being too sensitive, and him being noT sensitive enough. Sometimes, i actually feel that he care for himself more than me. In the past, he claimed that i nOt spending enough time with him. Then i sacrifices all my time with my friend to be with him. Now, he claims that he need some time for his friends, i've just got to try to change myself to not expect to see him that much anymore. I understand his point that i see my friend everyday yet he dont. But, why initially he makes me so used to his presence?

Alot of time, he told me that i have my strength, i'm great inside out. He tries all ways to boost my self esteem. But little does he kNow, when we quarrel over gers stuff, "i'm not a guy who is lack of women" will just throw me back down to a no self esteem me.

I love him, for no reason, with no regrets. But if i am push to a limit, i dont guarentee that i wont leave. I hate to say this, but is really a fact. I'll try my best to maintain this relationship well, and please work with me too. Doing it alone is really tiring, very tiring.... LOVE YOU WITH ALL I HAVE, LOVE YOU TILL I DIE.

new year eve

new year eve was quite a normal one. coz gj went msia, so couldnt have a proper gathering. in the end we decided to spend it ourselves. in the end, turn out to be quite boring. just had home cooked food, quite sumptous one, cooked by darling. then watch dvd and nth much.

i was a little sick too.. so dont really do much those 2 days. ya.

end~

Great X'mas 2006

yeah!!!! had a great xmas 2006!!! darling plan half the stuff and we went out with gj, sm, wp and wa. yeah!!!

it's been long since i've blogged le. missed me? wahhahaa..

that day was drizzling, i wore my best outfit, put a little make up and head down to orchard to meet them as we plan to had some ice cream little gift exchanging thing. the HUMAN JAM was bad!!! really just couldnt move, i swear i'll not go orchard during festive seasons again!! terrible!!

then finally met them. so cool!! it's been long since we all gather again. and a new member too!!! anyway, swensens was too packed. we decided to go starbucks instead. Darling was great at breaking ice. though wa was new, we able to joke and laugh at ease leading by darling!!! After which we went for movie!!! HUANG JIN JIA BY JAY CHOU!!! was kinda... bad show as the only good things about the show is the effects, the story was kinda boring. After which we went flare, saw his friend that he said abt. he said i was very presentable in front of his frenz. kekee... happy. Oh, met with yx too~~ sit down chill, count down together. around 2 plus we went sm's hse, had supper, relax a while then went back home. sm drove us home! GREAT! hehe... thanks alot man! then gj last min then realise the next day she got to work when it's already like 4 or 5 am in the morning! oh my!!!

had a great day. a different xmas. love it! thanks to all presence and thank u darling.

OH!! he gave me 2 calendar!! he made himself with his baby pic, our rabbits' pic and our artistic pic. hahaa... so nice!!! thanks thanks!!!